your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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