yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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