News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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