To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
