I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize