i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
