I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
