I showed him my bush... on skype.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize