The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
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We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.