Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize