haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
is it fun? or sober?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
