we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize