She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
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Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
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That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
dude. I can hear the air.
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