im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
