people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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