Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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