Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
