Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
