I cannot find my penis.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.