The maid of honor just puked.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Sex on roller skates
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night