This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
