jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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