He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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