Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize