Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
