i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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