The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
