just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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