So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
