Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
