Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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