Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.

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  (810) Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal. http://tfl.nu/hj11
  Replies (4) Good night (559) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?

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  (239): Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed? http://tfl.nu/9or7
  Replies (7) Good night (634) Bad night (2217) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back

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  (732): the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back http://tfl.nu/90ja
  Replies (3) Good night (1723) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.

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  (204): Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding. http://tfl.nu/e8lb
  Replies (19) Good night (950) Bad night (5748)
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  (650): View more from California

  It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.

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  (650): It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water. http://tfl.nu/g5w6
  Replies (14) Good night (695) Bad night (2529) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother

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  (970): they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother http://tfl.nu/e7je
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.

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  (815): I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time. http://tfl.nu/qrqx
  Replies (7) Good night (2298) Bad night (678) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.

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  (918): I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains. http://tfl.nu/wys7
  Replies (7) Good night (2419) Bad night (695)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.

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  (703): Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done. http://tfl.nu/tk11
  Replies (16) Good night (2624) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine

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  (248): Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine http://tfl.nu/ph8k
  Replies (3) Good night (1876) Bad night (483) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.

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  (814): I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos. http://tfl.nu/dk8h
  Replies (12) Good night (2649) Bad night (621) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is

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  (715): i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is http://tfl.nu/reex
  Replies (19) Good night (1316) Bad night (634)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"

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  (201): Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class" http://tfl.nu/e4eb
  Replies (2) Good night (672) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it

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  (317): He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it http://tfl.nu/wxzi
  Replies (4) Good night (698) Bad night (261) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot

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  (301): The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot http://tfl.nu/zrh0
  Replies (0) Good night (481) Bad night (196) Order T-Shirt

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