Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.

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(323): View more from California

Booty call?

(310): View more from California

Dude you don't even follow my twitter

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(520): View more from Arizona

But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.

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(410): View more from Maryland

Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy

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29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Read it at the TFLN blog
(845): View more from New York

This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.

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(818): View more from California

She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.

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(347): View more from New York

she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.

(1-347): View more from New York

ofcourse you didnt.

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(503): View more from Oregon

In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?

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(415): View more from California

Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine

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