I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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