yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
