I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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