I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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