PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Randomize
