this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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