Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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