i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
