You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
