So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize