I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
