I forgot how hot balto sounded
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
