my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize