So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
