I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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