and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
3pm strippers are depressing
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
