i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
