I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
