Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
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I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
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Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
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